Well, HELLO!

Myyy goodness. It sure has been awhile! Lots & lots have changed since I blogged last. Actually, there have been months on-end where I have literally forgotten that I had a blog and just how fun it was to write! I write so friggin' much for graduate school that I practically run AWAY from the computer after I'm finished with schoolwork. Updates? There are many. And for my regular readers (if ya'll are still alive?), you'll probably  be quite shocked.

In October of 2011, I graduated with a BA in Psychology and was pretty pumped that I set a goal many years ago and finally saw it through to the finish. I have a tendency to be a little flighty with follow-through. It's not that I don't ever want to complete things I start...I just procrastinate...it's in my blood, I s'pose.

On November 5, 2011, I married a high school friend of mine. :) Here he is:

Isn't he so cute?! We re-connected on Facebook (yep, you read right) and after several months of flying back and forth from Tampa to Indy (he lived in Tampa at the time), lots of begging (on his part...lol...I kid!), and prayer, he asked me to marry him the day before Easter of 2011. There is trust, friendship, safety, rest, and certainty in our marriage. Best of all: he loves my quirks and doesn't tear me down because of my faults. God hand-picked Harris for me. Isn't that so like God?

In the beginning of February of this year, I started graduate school at Liberty U to get my MA in Professional Counseling. I am loving my classes and cannot wait to see where God leads me when I finish in 2014. I considered a degree in social work but the program, the cost (come on, we all know that's an important factor too!), and the Lord's leading led me to choose counseling instead. I will become licensed in IN. and will go from there!

The bigger news: also in February, we found out we were expecting our first little miracle!

Baby boy's feet.

It's a boy and his EDD is October 5th. We are still busy getting the nursery prepared and we have roughly 9.5 weeks until he is finally here!

So. I feel a little more caught up with my blog. I don't know if I'll get the chance to write on here much after the baby is born, although that would be ideal. My posts will most likely change from ramblings about my own life to ramblings about my life as a wife and mother. Of that, I'm super excited. :) Praise God for this journey called LIFE.

 

Raw faith.

Hello, Bloggy friends. :) Long time, no see!  I've so missed writing/blogging!  I used to love coming on here and regurgitating some of my deepest, oftentimes random, thoughts.  So there.  I have to be honest, though.  I'm still on a bit of a Blogger hiatus.  I'm in school full-time and do most of my writing for classes.  Currently, I'm in the beginning stages of writing a book.  It's a autobiography with a focus on God and how He's worked in my life; but it'll be written in a way that someone who has not received the grace of God can read and perhaps relate to.  My first deadline is February 23rd, 2011.  So I really don't have much time to write about the first 16 years of my life. :) I have a lot to say!

On another note, I'm very relieved to say that God is absolutely doing a new thing in me.  Lately, I haven't been a church "regular."  I've become a bit burned out on traditional, in-the-box conformity.  I've even given it a name: raw faith.  It's called this simply because I've been very transparent with God lately and have been facing some pretty ugly junk and raw emotions in my heart; many of these things I thought I had learned already but it's almost like I've regressed back to square one.  I feel like a hypocrite saying I'm a Christian when I continue to fall short of what one would call a "good Christian."  Because of this, and the self-condemnation I feel most days, I've felt empty.  I am in desperate need of something else.

I still worship the same Jesus.  I'm just looking for a new way to do that.  I'm ready to reach people that most would never think twice about.  Tonight, I met just the group of people to help me in realizing what my gifts are and how we, as a Body (of Christ), can break free from conformity and have fellowship, accountability, worship, servitude, gratitude, grace, and mercy...alongside one another and all while reaching the "un-Churched."  Fishers Outpost is the name of our group and those who started it are a part of Mercy Road Fellowship.  We're not necessarily doing something new- we're just tired of the old!  We'll meet every Monday in an unassuming place where those who do not know Jesus can come and build relationships with a community of unassuming people.  I'm ready to step out of my comfort zone and let God really shake things up: both in me and through me.  

While I'm in the desert.

Deuteronomy 8:2 (New International Version)


2 Remember how the LORD your God led you all the way in the desert these forty years, to humble you and to test you in order to know what was in your heart, whether or not you would keep his commands.

I came across this verse this morning and it really prompted my heart to think about where I am in my walk with Jesus. I don’t have it all right. I make mistakes. The things I long for sometimes seem so out of my reach. But keeping Jesus in the forefront of my life, regardless if I have plenty or if I’m in want, is what God desires of me. His blessings are not what I live for. I live for Him and His blessings follow. As I wait patiently and prayerfully for a family, to work as a counselor, to live a life full of peace in every circumstance, I will keep His commands and wait on Him alone. My desert is the longing in my heart unfulfilled. But, if God is a good God (and He is), He has promised that He will give me the desires of my heart as I wait on Him (Psalm 37:4).

My dog teaches me lessons.

Spikey has a harrowing way of following me around the house; from room to room, right behind me. I hear his little nails hit the hardwood floors. His i.d. tag jingles noisily. Nine times out of ten I get annoyed with him. He’s so little that if I change my step quickly, I trip right over him. When I’m cleaning or doing things around the house, I get in a mode and usually don’t like to get ‘off course’. I can be a bit scatter-brained and so when I’m thrown off-track, sometimes I forget where I was and what I was doing.



I’ll tell him to go lie down. I’ll give him a treat but shortly after get flustered because....sure enough, right when he’s finished eating it, where is he? Under my feet.



I’ve realized, though, that when I take the time to just bend down (he’s a tiny boy) and pet him, give him kisses, and talk to him, he’ll just happily prance away and go play with his toys or do what he does best: be our neighborhood watch dog by making sure no little creatures cross or persons pass by without him knowing about it and giving everyone in the house a little verbal warning.



Maybe he’s teaching me something. I need to not be so busy that I don’t appreciate the people (and animals) in my life. That it’s okay to be thrown off-track; it’s the little, even sometimes mundane, things in life that can bring us the most joy, if we take the time to appreciate them and see them as blessings. God designed it this way! He enjoys watching us do everything from work in our gardens to cooking to playing with our pets. Let’s enjoy the mundane while today is still called today!



Thanks, peanut (aka spikey), for reminding momma about the importance of being thankful. : )

Ash

         This girl just makes me smile. : )